self and identity, self-regulation, interpersonal rejection and the need to belong, sexuality and gender, aggression, self-esteem, meaning, and self-presentation.
I've been dabbling in the social sciences while continuing my education, and Baumeister's name comes up soooo many times in my casual research. I first learned about him while sifting through the university library, picking up a book called Escaping the Self (1991).
(Please check out his official website, roybaumeister.com)
The subtitle reads: Alcoholism, Spirituality, Masochism, and Other Flights from the Burden of Selfhood. There's a lot to unpack from the cover alone! Most notably, we're brought to ponder how--in a society that celebrates and encourages things like self-love, self-esteem, and self-improvement--selfhood could possibly be a burden.
Without giving too much of the book away, I'm going to leave the pursuit of this book to you. I highly recommend picking up a copy. It's well worth the read.
I would, however, like to investigate how Baumeister writes about the self in one of his earlier works, the 1987 article (which you should DEFINITELY read if you have a moment) entitled "How the Self Became a Problem." Near the beginning of this article lies this articulation of the self over time:
(Click to enlarge)
(Everything from here down is my paraphrasing Baumeister's article cited above. I have no intention of passing off any of these ideas as my own.)
As Baumeister walks us through evidence (literary and otherwise) from each historical era, we see how people move from a collective identity, or group identity, to an individual identity. An interpretation of the Latin expression unus pro omnibus, omnes pro uno (one for all, and all for one) can help me illustrate the difference between collective and individual identity. "One for all" simplifies the mentality of collectivism--we are people, we identify with a group. "All for one" can represent individualism--I am a person, I identify as an individual. The closer Baumeister brings us to the present day, the further we (Western society, anyway) move from collectivism. The further we move away from collectivism, the more evidence can be found of people feeling resentful toward the collective whole, society. People were like the proverbial fish learning that it has spent its life in water. "[T]he early 20th century citizens saw themselves as utterly in the grip of social forces and powers that were indifferent to them personally."
Defining the self and establishing potential and fulfillment used to be in relation to how you contributed to the group. You received your role and performed your duties. That was fulfillment up until about the end of the Middle Ages (p. 169). Once people became more self-aware, the idea of people's inner worlds started to appear in literature. With the dissonance between inner- and outer-self came self-deception. That's where shit gets nasty.
I really want to write more about this article, but you reeeeeeally need to click the link provided to read this article yourself. The purpose of this blog is to share tools and ideas that have helped me manage my darkness. If you find that you have a brutal inner voice, the idea of identifying and dissecting the self is a good step forward. These works I've mentioned are a great place to start.
Before I sign off, I want to let you know that the contact box on the right is for you. :) If you ever need to open up to somebody or even if you connect with something I've shared, I'd love to hear from you.
Have a nice day or night, friends! Stay well.
